Midwest author holds book signing in PdC
Joyce Gibbs participated in a book signing at the Prairie du Chien Memorial Library on October 23 to help raise awareness of domestic violence and intimate partner violence. (Steve Van Kooten/Courier Press)
Passages, Inc. helps sponsor author visit for domestic abuse awareness
By Steve Van Kooten
Domestic violence is still a taboo subject, even when 10 million people per year suffer some form of violence in their own home.
It’s difficult to speak out, especially when you’re a survivor, but that’s what Joyce Gibbs did when she wrote Portrayed Crazy: A Memoir of Spousal Abuse in 2019.
On October 23, Gibbs visited the Prairie du Chien Memorial Library for a book signing and to share her story.
“We were going through Hell going back and forth, living in the same house,” she said.
“When you live with an abusive person, psychologically, physically, mentally, spiritually — you name it — it just sucks you down,” she said. “It don’t [sic] only affect your mind; it affects your body.”
For a survivor, getting away from an abusive situation is just the first step toward recovery. Gibbs found that out when she finally left her husband, her home, and her community — she left her entire life behind.
“I finally get on my own, I get divorced, and I’m actually going further and further down into depression. I couldn’t get out, and I didn’t know what to do,” she said.
The isolation she experienced during the abuse didn’t magically go away; there weren’t many people on her side. Her family “backed away” from her, as did her spouse’s relatives. She was protrayed crazy, as the title of her book implies.
“That’s what they do: they isolate you,” she said. “The number one thing is isolation.”
Getting away from an abusive partner can be tough because there is still a stigma attached to domestic violence.
According to Gibbs, survivors may have to give up everything they have to break free.
“I was so angry and so mad about what he did during the divorce, but, my God, forget the crap, let him have all the stuff; it was the fact that he had taken my family away from me and that he had told everybody I was crazy. Now, how do I get my name and reputation? I lost everything. I had to start over.”
The emotional and physical toll abuse inflicts on a person doesn’t end when they leave the situation; it hangs on through legal proceedings, public discussion, and treatment care. The scars can be deep and permanent. It has been 15 years after she left, and she’s still in survivor mode.
“I never understood PTSD with men or women in the service, but I understand now that when they come home, you can’t just pick up the pieces and life is good. It doesn’t work that way,” Gibbs said.
Rather than retreat from her adversity, she started to read. She read hundreds of books on domestic abuse, where she learned the terminology and the statistics and discovered other people with stories similar to her own.
“As I’m reading, I’m going, ‘Oh my god, somebody else gets me,” she said. “It was a healing—part of it was healing for me.”
Then she began to write. Eventually, she had a book full of the ups and downs of her journey. It didn’t happen overnight.
“I wrote a lot of stuff after that just to get it out of my head, and it took me almost eight years to do that,” Gibbs said. “I knew nothing about computers. I was a mess.”
After she finished the book, Gibbs struggled to promote her story until she started exploring online options.
“I was never on Facebook until 2022, and I had a podcast, and that broke it wide open because I was scared to tell anybody that I wrote the book.”
Since then, she’s made her book available on Amazon, commissioned billboards near her home in Iowa, and started reaching out to people as an advocate. Gibbs’ story is one that millions of people in the United States can relate to; it’s about a life taken away one piece at a time and journey through Hell and back to reclaim it piece by piece.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence or intimate partner violence, you can contact Passages, Inc. at 800-236-4325 24 hours a day to receive help. Passages, Inc. is an advocate and service provider for domestic and sexual abuse or any other crime.
The shelter is located in Richland County and offers service throughout Southwest Wisconsin. It can also be contacted at director@passagesrc.com.
